i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
someone wrote "the short drunk lives here" on our door. i already have a reputation
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
I put an asterick after the names of people in my phone that I've fucked. Both as a form of bragging, and also so I can actually remember all their names.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
Found trail of ibuprofen on ground. I'm like the intervention version of e.t.
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
Randomize