...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together.
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
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