I just cut my nipple shaving
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
Randomize
