he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
You nicknamed her "lazy eye" and were screaming across the bar at her to buy you a drink...
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
Oh god. I finally realized why the coked out Stevie wonder was explaining the concept of movember to the McDonalds clerk. Drunk me didn't process that another month comes after Halloween... It's apparently November.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
Good morning! So would you prefer me to show up kind of late or on time but looking like I got chewed up and spat out by an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer?
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
I just cut open the plastic package of a Plan B pill using the bottle opener I carry in my purse. #whyidrink
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
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