i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
Randomize
