Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
Observations from Vegas: #1. Strippers pasties pose a choking hazard. #2. Best. Heimlich. Ever.
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
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