Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
just so you know, your brother isn't driving home wasted tonight. he is, instead, in my dorm shower screaming about rubbing his butt with my loofah; thought you would be proud
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
Randomize
