Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
I told her I had to go to work this morning, got fully dressed in a suit, walked her out, drove around the block, parked, and walked right back in my apt and went back to sleep..
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
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I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
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Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
I just puked in a chili’s bathroom... happy birthday to me
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
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