okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
I stumbled in at 6am to find my cat in the window making a noise I've never heard her make. When I went to the window there was a goat outside staring at us.
Are you sure? Or did you just think there was a goat?
No there was a goat. I gave it a donut.
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
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