I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
woke up with the bag of wine duct taped to my shoulder.
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
Randomize