i just used a urinal to avoid climbing stairs, i need to quit drinking.
Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
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