But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
I just threw up while getting a haircut. I'm never trying to accomplish stuff with a hangover again.
We need large glitter to throw at people to signify our mystic nature
Fuck their feelings and their drinks they will get hit with sparkly confetti
I went home with a guy last night because he showed me some magic tricks and kept shouting "THEY'RE ILLUSIONS MICHAEL!"
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
The party bus is stocked with 5 hour energies and beer and someone handing out adderall. Best. Wedding. Ever.
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
That moment when you’re at the doctor to give a sperm sample you’re only getting 3G so the porn is buffering
Randomize
