I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
I literally just rubbed my stomach and told my liver to "hang in there baby"
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
Randomize
