...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
i bought another $5 worth of vodka. with change. i look like a homeless alcoholic. i need your dino cups or else i'll be forced to make a giant jello bowl shot
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
Tinder date just called. I was supposed to be there 30 minutes ago but I'm on a 27 game win streak in Park...?
Fuck that man! Tell her your dog died or something. Reschedule that shit, you can't stop 2K at a time like that. Ball is life bro... Priorities.
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
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