sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
I stood up and a chip flew out of my shirt and landed in the chip dish. I just walked away.
i woke up this morning in my bathroom,naked, with my boxers around my face and puke and shit on the floor and wondering why i didn't have a toenail on my one big toe.
compared to you, a hobo is quite responsible.
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
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