i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
Just threw up at the table during our Father's Day dinner. And I managed to get quite a bit on dad, so that was nice.
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
It doesn't matter how many times you look in your purse, Your keys are not going to be there. Maybe you left them at the bar.
Maybe they fell out of my pocket last night when I rolled down the hill.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
I may have just masturbated while on hold with the IRS. don't judge me
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
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