how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
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