And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
How does it feel to date your dad?
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
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