i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
Theres a handprint of sauce on my fridge, one on my face, and a trail of it leading to my bedroom, and sauce all in my bed, and I have no idea what the fuck i ate.
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
Randomize
