She is in my trunk
the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
captain morgan taught me last night that resee's puffs are way better when eaten straight out of the sink.
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
Randomize