Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
When you went through airport security you asked if the could check if a baby was in there. That drunk.
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Randomize
