I woke up this morning and I couldn't find my coffeetable. wtf?
he thought i was a dude.
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone left a shot of disaronno in a champagne glass here this morning... flip a coin?
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
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