I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
Watching Fresh Prince at 9am with a beer in hand and he just said to Uncle Phil "Sometimes I worry that I'll never get my life together." I feel like that was a sign from above or something
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
I think my moral compass just broke
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
Randomize
