all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
Alcohol only hurts me because he loves me.
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
i spent an hour trying to convince my psychiatrist that the fact that i showed up for my appointment drunk was progress, and she does not agree
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it bad that all my wine bottles have teeth marks in the cork?
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
the most terrified I've ever been was seeing Danny Devito squirming on the ground in this underwear, covered in hand sanitizer, completely hairless
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.