Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
Randomize