So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
Drunk enough that you donated $50 to taco bell, because they serve a great purpose.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It says a lot about the way my life is going right now that 'there's no shit in your house' is fucking good news.
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
Randomize