On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
im shotgunning beers in the kitchen. alone. the cat is judging me.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
You can't text people with drinkers' regret at 8 in the morning. It's just bad form.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
Accidentally typed message to mom that included word "kink." FML. Played it off as autocorrect from "drink" which was somehow more acceptable
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
Randomize
