Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
Just managed to stab myself in the ass with a fork. I feel that as my best friend, I'm obligated by friend code to inform you of that sort of thing.
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
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