Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
His birthday is on fathers day. I know its a cruel coincedence but this is too funny to pass up.
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
I hope in my next life I'm a sterile trophy wife. With a husband who showers me in wealth and gifts but can't get a hard on. Do you think my karma is good enough for that?
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
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