just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
I have a running excel spreadsheet detailing the number of shots in a night and subsequent ability to masturbate
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
Well I accidentally flashed a 76 year old woman, i'm in a house full of republicans and Im almost drunk enough to give the gay rights speech so i'd say this wedding reception is going great
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
Randomize
