Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
