So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
Randomize
