was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
Do you realize we just stole 12 dollars worth of quarters each from the office petty cash just to get manicures? New high or New Low?
He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
I literally forgot every French word I knew and blurted out “mange moi” so he went down on me like I was some baguette fresh outta the oven!!!! I passed out.
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
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