I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
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Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
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Can we just cry and dive into a couch-sized bag of sadness-chips, dip them in a la-z-boy sized jar of depression salsa while watching a show called 'Forget Your Hopes and Dreams, Just Kill Yourself'?
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
The free coupon that printed out with the purchase of my plan b emergency contraception was for allergy meds. I feel like a coupon for condoms would've been more fitting in this situation.
Oh wait. It's for wart remover. Fitting, afterall.
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
i out mim tonsoeep
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