haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
Vodka + horseback riding = vomit in the saddle bags
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
Randomize