you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
Error 1684C: You're last text was undeeliverable. Subscriber is our to the aera.
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
You said too many real things and now I need to crawl back inside my protective fort of sarcasm, being an asshole, and sass
Shut up. The only friend I need in life is Jim Beam because life is meaningless.
FUCK WHALES
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
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