Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
Randomize
