Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
Sitting in bed reading a porn novel off my phone and accidentally just made Siri start reading the most graphic part aloud. FUN FIRST NIGHT WITH THE NEW ROOMIE.
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
