ADVERTISEMENT

• (781): View more from Massachusetts

  i just walked in on my sister drunkenly sobbing to sarah mclachlan. its time for an intervention.

  (1-781): View more from Massachusetts

  didn't that happen to you last weekend?

  (781): View more from Massachusetts

  shut up.

  Fav 5 1286 2228

  share tweet
  

• (727): View more from Florida

  how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?

  Fav 42 10753 1649

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (908): View more from New Jersey

  It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!

  Fav 20 8289 1343

  share tweet
  

• (315): View more from New York

  I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.

  Fav 4 2292 1299

  share tweet
  
• 

  21 People Tragically Stumbled Upon A Dead Body

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (916): View more from California

  Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.

  Fav 3 2186 807

  share tweet
  

• (708): View more from Illinois

  I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.

  Fav 2 931 1665

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (715): View more from Wisconsin

  Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.

  Fav 7 2742 1054

  share tweet
  

• (515): View more from Iowa

  he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.

  (1-515): View more from Iowa

  and you said he wasn't worth calling.

  Fav 17 2168 889

  share tweet
  

• (561): View more from Florida

  I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.

  Fav 3 1216 668

  share tweet
  
• 

  27 Socially Expected Things That Are The Absolute Worst

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (847): View more from Illinois

  A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover

  Fav 4 1490 672

  share tweet
  

• (517): View more from Michigan

  I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.

  Fav 1 939 463

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (623): View more from Arizona

  There's times when I need to be plowed... and I'm ashamed to admit auto correct was able to predict that entire sentence.

  Fav 2 1176 546

  share tweet
  

• (260): View more from Indiana

  I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.

  Fav 1 64 11

  share tweet
  

• (414): View more from Wisconsin

  She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!

  Fav 1 121 9

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (226): View more from Ontario

  I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage

  Fav 1 16 38

  share tweet
  

Randomize