Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(352): View more from Florida

the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.

(407): View more from Florida

given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was

(352): View more from Florida

i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it

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(352): the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight. (407): given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was (352): i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it http://tfl.nu/tb83

Replies (41) Good night (3320) Bad night (1199)
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(918): View more from Oklahoma

You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.

(1-918): View more from Oklahoma

Shut up. I did not.

(918): View more from Oklahoma

I really wish I was making that up.

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(918): You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras. (1-918): Shut up. I did not. (918): I really wish I was making that up. http://tfl.nu/wbcz

Replies (35) Good night (6689) Bad night (757)
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(918): View more from Oklahoma

Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine.

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(918): Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine. http://tfl.nu/dowa

Replies (31) Good night (1848) Bad night (3619)
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(423): View more from Tennessee

Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely

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(423): Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely http://tfl.nu/wliv

Replies (37) Good night (546) Bad night (4154)
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(570): View more from Pennsylvania

just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on

(908): View more from New Jersey

I knew I fell for you for a reason

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(570): just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on (908): I knew I fell for you for a reason http://tfl.nu/lpgl

Replies (17) Good night (3443) Bad night (1052)
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(903): View more from Texas

Pretty sure I left lotion and my bra in your car. I've secured your fathers belief that your straight. You can thank me later

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(903): Pretty sure I left lotion and my bra in your car. I've secured your fathers belief that your straight. You can thank me later http://tfl.nu/a1zy

Replies (19) Good night (8598) Bad night (913)
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(360): View more from Washington

I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too

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(360): I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too http://tfl.nu/ui5h

Replies (6) Good night (3274) Bad night (1157)
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(217): View more from Illinois

The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend

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(217): The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend http://tfl.nu/q6fw

Replies (14) Good night (5237) Bad night (812)
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(612): View more from Minnesota

Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.

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(612): Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes. http://tfl.nu/p3u3

Replies (3) Good night (2617) Bad night (838)
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(760): View more from California

I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.

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(760): I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free. http://tfl.nu/mdao

Replies (7) Good night (3103) Bad night (1141)
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(778): View more from British Columbia

Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%

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(778): Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25% http://tfl.nu/4mvy

Replies (5) Good night (1100) Bad night (563)
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(775): View more from Nevada

The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me

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(775): The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me http://tfl.nu/fs79

Replies (3) Good night (1200) Bad night (518)
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(909): View more from California

i wasnt laughing because you were puking, i was laughing because three yards away there was a couple seriously getting it on

(901): View more from Tennessee

continuing my moment killer tradition in the best possible way

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(909): i wasnt laughing because you were puking, i was laughing because three yards away there was a couple seriously getting it on (901): continuing my moment killer tradition in the best possible way http://tfl.nu/cwtc

Replies (1) Good night (1021) Bad night (335)
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(780): View more from Alberta, CA

Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo

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(780): Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo http://tfl.nu/12ln

Replies (3) Good night (810) Bad night (276)
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(505): View more from New Mexico

I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy

(1-505): View more from New Mexico

No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad

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(505): I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy (1-505): No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad http://tfl.nu/sh07

Replies (1) Good night (546) Bad night (227)

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