All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
I am not exagerating when I say the thought "screw you future me" actually just went through my head
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
Randomize
