; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
saw you had $9 in your checking acct, left $20 on your dresser so you won't be a whore this weekend
If you're on a tempurpedic mattress do you think you can feel if someone is jacking off right next to you?
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
People kept wishing me happy birthday last night. apparently i was 21st birthday drunk
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
Randomize