her vagine was all disorganized.
batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
I found my phone outside under the leaves by the curb. What the fuck did I do last night
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
I wrote a pretty good eulogy, too. Motherfucker pastor had no sense of comedic timing.
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
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