Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize