Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
the people of mcdonalds are all starring at me & this dude like they know we just slept together
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The waitress at the airport bar just asked me if I wanted a "to go" beer, hahahahaha OF COURSE I WANT A TO GO BEER.
I'm pretty sure that the bartender arranged a marriage for me last night. Sounds like a legit birthday present to me.
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
Randomize