Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
Bring a bathing suit and your good liver.
My good liver is still at the dry cleaners. Will my backup liver suffice?
Maybe
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
Randomize
