Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
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