Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
today is my dealer's birthday. i dont know whether to give him the day off or call him saying happy birthday ill take a quarter please
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
Randomize
