i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
I am available for nakedness
PS if you want to hear something hilarious as my little sister was showing me her engagement ring I open a Snapchat from R and it's literally a dick pic. Very different points in our life
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
Randomize
