Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
He went out to smoke and when he came back I was still in the same spot naked and unable to breathe.
All I could say was, "ladies and gentlemen, THIS is why I drive 30 mins"
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
Randomize
