Well the candle wax mightve been sexy if he didn't drop the candle and light half my bed on fire
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
I woke up remembering only that I got pulled over by a cop, then looked over and found that same cop, naked.
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
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